A quick update

I really haven't given you all much information concerning Aiden's progress recently. I decided that tonight I would give you an update. He has definitely had some ups and downs.

So here we go. For those of you who are interested in Aiden's physical therapy it is actually going well. He is stepping up well, using both his left and right legs. He still shows a preference for the left, but repetition with the right leg is helping. He is also getting the idea of how to step down. Until recently, when he stepped down his supporting leg would collapse. This week he was able to step down 6 out of 10 times without collapsing.

Aiden's therapy typically begins with weight lifting. Since our time in Richmond we have struggled to get Aiden to use his ABductors (the muscles that allow you to side step). He could get a little hip movement (hip hike) but mostly he was squeezing his gluties. This week we achieved not only hip hikes but actual movement!!! You may be sitting there thinking "Big deal, so the kid can move his legs in and out." But for those of us who have worked so hard for this, it means that another motor movement has been mapped and he is able to differentiate the between his glutes, hip flexors and abductors.

I am having to leave much of my work undone (not that I really mind or that anyone would really notice) because Aiden is now doing a lot of independent walking. He is standing himself up (usually from a chair or a stool) and going. I am having to follow him around to make sure that if he falls he falls forward. Actually, he has fallen backwards several times in the last several weeks, and he is definitely bending at the knees! This is a huge relief for Dave and me. It means that Aiden is learning to protect his head; no helmet for us right now.

Finally, Aiden is beginning to play; really play. No he isn't putting puzzles together and he isn't playing Candyland, but he is finding enjoyment in toys. He is sitting and using toys. He is interacting with us as he plays, and he is taking turns with me. Aiden is also learning to kick a ball (on purpose). It is exciting to watch as lights begin to come on for Aiden.

He is still not signing at all. We actually are not encouraging any signing in order to cause Aiden to stop using the juice sign for everything. His use of the single sign has decreased to almost nothing. This is a good thing according to our speech therapist. She feels that perhaps we pushed Aiden expressively. I am not 100% sure that I agree, but at this time I will follow the plan. We are working on Aiden's receptive language skills and he seems to be following more and longer directions. I asked him to come to me and sit down in his little chair the other day. He totally followed the directions. I was really surprised and thrilled.

There are some really good things happening right now. I continue to struggle with the speed of his development and with the fear that he will always struggle to move and communicate, but the Lord is faithful to move us to places where we can receive His healing. (Guess I'm going to have to make many moves in my future!)

Blessings to all and continue to pray for Shannon and her family. Thank you for all of your support and encouragement.
Blessings,
Christa

Into the new year

We are blessed to have a rather large extended family. Many of them we see throughout the year, some we only see on special occasions. We decided to begin the new year with a visit to Gran.

Gran is my very special grandma thus making her Aiden's (and Aaron's and Addison's) very special great-grandma. Gran lives in Richmond, but because of the nature of her health issues and the institutional setting in which she lives it is a treat for her to see Aiden. He was actually really excited to visit because Gran's nursing home has long tiled halls. We
brought his gait trainer along for the visit, and he was off like a shot. It was unfortunate that the resident in the room next to Gran really liked to watch TV with the volume up. Aiden heard the sound of the police show that was on and made a bee line to the gentleman's door. It was like taking candy from a very angry baby when we moved him back to Gran's room.

This aside, Gran was able to see Aiden and watch as he traveled the halls. There have been times when they were both in physical therapy at the same time, and Gran has called to encourage Aiden to keep up the good (hard) work. I miss the days when Gran was able to do those things, and despite the fact that at this time she may not always understand what is happening, I know that this woman; one who traveled weekly to see me in NOVa when I was a child, would do the same for my little one if she could.


















My family continues to be a great help and support for me. We stayed through the new year with my parents. During this time Aiden decided that he would no longer use the signs that had become common. He just stopped signing everything but juice. I was devastated. I realize that we will come up against obstacles on this journey, but this did not seem like an obstacle. It felt to me like I had come to the edge of a cliff and just stepped off. I cried and cried; simply curled up on the floor and wept.

So what, you may be asking, caused this apparent lapse in Aiden's

















communication?
Why did he stop signing everything but juice? I don't know; our therapist doesn't know; the people who answer questions on the Internet don't know. My tears were my only option; my only release.

Honestly, I cried out to the Lord. I cried and cried out to Him. I felt like I was in a box and I couldn't get out and God couldn't get in. (Logically speaking I know that my emotions are really not to be trusted. God on the other hand, is always to be trusted.)

So how do you get beyond the feeling that you're praying to the ceiling? I began to focus on the blessings that I do have. Yes, things are not exactly as I had imagined they would be. Sure I expected that my son would not face the challenges that we see everyday. Of course I would like our situation to be different. Still, I am blessed with a child who faces each new morning with joy. He smiles more than he cries. He finds humor in little things. He brings me new understanding of my own purpose in this world. Aiden is teaching us all about acceptance and grace.

Yes, I had a bad couple of days. Yes, it is just another step on the path that we are taking on this journey to become more like Jesus. Fortunately there is hope for the future. In Isaiah 61:3-4 the prophet speaks of what Jesus will do for God's children; for me, for my family, for those who love the Lord:
" He has sent me to bind up the broken hearted, to provide freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance for our God, to comfort all who mourn and provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair..."

I want to wear that garment of praise and my crown of beauty. I want those of you who read to do the same. We have been given a blessing in those gifts. They remove the world's hold on us and free us to live for the Lord. Live with that freedom.

Thank you all for your prayers. I sincerely covet them. They get me through the days when I am standing on the edge; when I can only see the ashes. As well, I have spoken to Shannon recently. Please pray for health for her household. Both Makayla and Ariana have strep throat. It is the 3rd(?) major illness in her home since November. Also, continue to pray for marriages.

Blessings to you all,
Christa

A word on marriage

Marriage can be difficult; taking two completely different and independent people and placing them in a relationship that requires give and take, self-sacrifice and compromise. How in the world does it work? The reality is that sometimes it seems overwhelming and not always worth the effort.

The first several weeks of Dave's and my marriage threatened to be the only weeks of our marriage. Due to excessive stress, Dave's 80 hour a week work schedule, and other health issues, I was not happy about being married. I remember sitting down with Dave and telling him that marrying him was the biggest mistake of my life and I was stuck with him forever!!! It was terrible. (It was only 3 weeks into marriage!)

I know how distressing it can be to feel like you are sinking in a swamp of discontent and misery. I remember how depressed and lonely I felt. It was as if God had called me into a relationship that would never succeed. (Actually, I have called this the Prozac period in my life, despite the lack of pharmaceuticals!!) Fortunately, both God and Dave are faithful.

I believe that marriage it ordained by God; that it is a blessing and a gift, but I know that it is also hard work. I know that there are days when Dave and I each wonder exactly what it is that the Lord wants us to learn through our marriage. Let's be honest, it is a difficult course with a hard teacher in a tough school. (But I like to think that I am an over achiever and will eventually make a decent grade!!)

Right now in the lives of many married couples there are difficulties. Marriage is under such attack. If the family is destroyed than despair rules and trust, love and security are broken; the ability of children to see a loving heavenly Father is obscured. Hopelessness becomes the norm.

In the last several weeks I have watched a family fall apart. The wife cares for 3 small children; one child with a disability, the husband is in a high stress job protecting the public. Maintaining a marriage is challenging. Add in a child with a disability or a high stress job and the challenges multiply. Both in a marriage---overwhelming. I don't know if this couple will be able to overcome this damaging situation.

Please pray for marriages today. Pray that couples will communicate honestly and lovingly. Ask the Lord to provide understanding. Pray for marriages that are in crisis; for healing and renewal. Finally, if you know families with challenging situations: spouses in the service, fire fighters, police, children with disabilities, long-term illnesses; be available to help. Be aware that they may need someone to talk to, a couple to come along beside them and mentor them.

Thank you so much for your prayers.
Blessings to all,
Christa

All I want for Christmas.....

Sometimes children have the ability to tell you exactly what will thrill them on Christmas morning. Sometimes what they tell you would be the perfect gift turns out not to be what was expected and there is much disappointment and disillusionment. As a parent you would like to give your kids what they want (within reason of course), but that does not always happen.

It is an extra challenge with Aiden because he cannot tell us what toy would make his kid dreams come true. So we searched high and low looking for a toy that is action packed, brightly colored, easy to operate, very sturdy, and won't break the bank. This Christmas we got him a little train.

It runs on it's own track or runs on floor. Having both options is super because the likelihood that the train will eventually be on floor is great. It starts up by either pushing on the head of the engineer, or
by pushing on the button the engineer sits on. It has 3 figures, a monkey, an elephant, and the engineer. They are rubbery plastic and can be chewed on if the desire over takes you. (This desire overtakes Aiden on a momentary basis.)

The whole set is compact for storage and small for playing. It was relatively inexpensive, and not too difficult to find. Mostly, though, Aiden seems to really like it.

Last Christmas Aiden was really not very interested in any of the festivities. He was still not very mobile and if it wasn't TV he just couldn't focus on the gift. It was a little disheartening to watch. As a Christmas baby, I usually find much excitement in the process of Christmas as well as the joy of giving gifts. Aiden did not find the joy in the process.

Perhaps that is why I had such a hard time entering into the Christmas spirit this year. I know that I blamed it on Thanksgiving two weeks ago, but maybe it was an attempt to guard against being disappointed. (OK, so I sometimes over-analyze things. Who really knows what my subconscious is thinking??)

Thankfully, this year was a little different. Aiden did enter into the excitement more. He at least acknowledged the gift, if not the excitement of receiving it. And he did actually play. It is not typical for him to play for any extended period of time. Christmas day he did.

I continue to learn from Aiden. I am personally blessed to have such a dear little teacher. (In all actuality, it could definitely be less pleasant.) Jesus said that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. (Matthew 11:30) I am choosing to accept the yoke and the burden from the Lord. I will allow Him to carry the things that I am certainly not able in my own strength to carry. Those things only weigh me down and steal the joy that I can hold on to in order to get through each day.

I am also learning to accept the gift(s) that my Heavenly Father has given me. Matthew 7:11 says, "If you then, evil as you are know how to give good and advantageous gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven [perfect as He is] give good and adventageous gifts to those who keep on asking Him!! I have been given good gifts. It is imperative that I remind myself of this when the voices of discouragement try to convince me otherwise. It is not only important for me personally, but for all of us, and in any situation, to find the blessings of the "good gifts". So, keep your eyes on the gifts. Remember that they are given by the One who can only give good gifts.

Blessings to you all.

~Christa

PS Notice the last picture. Do you see anyone familiar (other than Aiden)? Yes, it is Girlfriend!!! (If you don't know Girlfriend, check back to late Oct.)

Twas the night before Christmas...

I've mentioned our friends at Pufferbellies Toys several times. They have been an encouragement to us as a family since they opened their doors. As well, without any real explanation from us, Susan and Erin Blanton were willing to donate to Hope Foundation,and follow Aiden's progress during intensive.

Unfortunately, with the busyness of this time of the year, Aiden and I had not been in the shop since we returned from our adventure in physical therapy. So on the 24th of December (thus the title:) all of us headed downtown. We didn't have any real shopping to do. It just seemed important to see the ladies at Pufferbellies.

It is always a treat to visit because there is such an air of love for both children and the toy business. The store is packed with great games, toys that encourage imagination, old favorites and books to entice even the most uninterested reader. There is a train table, a library nook, art and craft supplies, legos, playmobil and dollies. (Can you tell that I love this store?!!) And this year, the windows are so enchanting. I was raised on the windows at Miller and Rhodes and Thalhiemers in Richmond. Not quite Macy's in NY, but in my mind, close!!

We walked in with all of the kids and were greeted by the ladies behind the counter. Whether they know us by name I'm not sure, but they welcomed us graciously. Aiden and I walked to the back to see the train table. A former Lee High student (I am so sorry to
have forgotten her name because she is so sweet) hugged me and let me know how wonderful Aiden seemed to be doing. She must have gone to get Susan because she came out of the office to see us.

Susan watched as Aiden played and walked around the table. He was doing his best to set little wooden cars on the track while keeping his balance. I think that she was impressed with the improvement that she saw in Aiden.

Erin met us as Aiden was heading up the ramp (towards the front door!!). She sat down with us as Aiden grabbed her thumb and walked up the ramp. He pulled her to go with him. With a great feeling of gratefulness I watched my son. He was working so hard to have some independence.

Erin and I stood up to accommodate Aiden's trek to the front door. I caught her eye as we moved forward. As I have been in the past, she was moved to tears. I don't know if it was because of the sheer effort that Aiden was exerting; more likely it was wonder at his determination, joy in his accomplishment, and maybe a little sadness that it seems so difficult. I am continually amazed at the range of emotions that run through me at such times. I could only reach forward and hug Erin. No words (except, "don't you do this!") would have been truly appropriate.

We left shortly after this encounter. The store was closing early and Aiden was ready for a nap. I was glad that we had stopped by. As we were driving out of the parking lot I watched Susan take in the giraffe and the open sign down. I mentioned that I was glad that we had stopped in. Dave said, "As I was walking out Susan stopped me. She said that bringing Aiden had really made their Christmas." What a blessing that we have such encouragement in our lives.

Thank you to all who are doing their best to encourage our family or other families like ours. Your love and support are truly appreciated, even if you are not thanked enough. We appreciate your prayers and would continue to ask you to lift us to the Lord.

Blessings to all,

Christa