Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas!!

I just wanted to take a minute to let you know what a blessing each of you have been to me these last few months. Your encouragement, prayers, and support have been priceless. As well, having the opportunity to freely express my struggles and victories as they pertain to Aiden, and to my personal walk of faith, has been therapeutic.

I will continue this process throughout the new year and hope that you will continue to follow, pray and perhaps grow with us as we seek to help Aiden to gain his independence and as I seek to gain in my dependence (on the Lord).

Thank you all so much.
Blessings to each of you during this season,
Christa

Some good stuff in PT

Since returning from Hope Therapy in early November, I have felt terribly unable to really provide the kind of PT that Aiden needs. I am not knocking my good helper and friend Tara. She is doing a great job. Unfortunately, this has not been a stellar health month for her. Taking into account the Thanksgiving holiday, her falling off a roof and a respiratory virus/ear infection, daily PT has been solely my responsibility.

We were going through the motions; exercises, practice up and down, sit to stand, step up step down. Was Aiden really getting anything, or was he just following the physical cues? I couldn't answer the question.

On Wednesday (12/18) Tara and I decided to make things a little more difficult; Aiden had to stand from a box 2 1/2 inches tall. I didn't think that he'd be able to do it. Surprise!!!!! He did.

The pictures are of Aiden going through the steps to standing. He had a couple of wiggles in the middle, but on the whole, he was steady and eager to succeed. Grant it the TV remote was the "carrot on the string" for him. Still, it was a small victory for us.

So Friday Tara and I decided to change things up a little. We loaded all of the kids into the van and headed for church. We used the fellowship hall for PT. Aiden was able to walk using his gait trainer for 20-25 minutes. He maneuvered around tables, chairs, into and out of the kitchen, around counters, through doorways, on tile and over carpet. (sounds a little like an overland expedition doesn't it?)


Once Aiden tired of that we loaded him onto his tricycle. Around and around he went. He was not doing a lot of the pedalling, but he was at least getting the idea of what he should be doing. We gave him about 5-10 minutes to ride before we headed to the steps.

I should have known better than to wait to the end to tackle stairs, but I will remember for the next time. That having been said, Aiden did not enjoy the down of the stairs. On the up, however, he surprised us both by moving fairly quickly right,left, right, etc. without using his arms to pull.

It is not rocket science. I am well aware that for most kids his age this is no big deal, but on Friday my son walked up stairs like most 3 year olds do. He did something typical. Perhaps his brain is beginning to realize more of what it should do. Maybe all of the motor mapping that we've been attempting is paying off. Just maybe we are seeing a bit of a miracle.

I am choosing to believe that this is a small miracle for Aiden. I am also believing that there will be more. I am storing up in my heart those things that people have said to me over the last 4 years; those words that I believe have come from God, and I will remember them. I will be encouraged by them when I am sad. I will pray them over my child and I will remind my Lord of His promises to me and to Aiden.

Dear friends, thank you for your faithfulness to us as a family, and to me personally. I covet your prayers and thank God for you. Please know that my prayers are lifted for you as you enter into this holy season. Be blessed remembering that the Lord of love came into this world to save us, not to condemn us. What an awesome gift! Pray for miracles for us. (I am believing for a special gift this year.) I want to hear my little son's voice. (I feel like Shadrach, Meshack, and Abednego. "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, but even if He doesn't, we want you to know, O king, that we will not worship your idols." Daniel 3:17-18. I will expect, and I will not choose disbelief.)

Blessings to you all for Christmas!

Christa

The signs of the season

While at church two weeks ago someone said something about trusting the Lord and being willing to move forward with whatever step He had planned; to expect that the Lord had great things (this is all Christa's paraphrased). I sat there and wondered why I stopped seeking other options for Aiden.

Over the last several weeks I have been thinking about my position on Aiden's future. Prior to our visit to Richmond I had been actively seeking information about adult stem cell therapy and I was seeking out programs that provide such treatment. Once we decided to follow through with the intensive therapy I let my search fall to the wayside.

One could argue that I had done so because I was so busy with the therapy program and then with the follow up; that I was focusing on the immediate issues and could pick up with the research when we were finished. I guess that could be the case. It could be that I am still trying to work out the kinks in our schedules here; that to regain some balance and stability I am putting the research off. Reality---I am just a little scared.

To go to China to have adult stem cell therapy would mean a cost of tens of thousands of dollars. It would mean an investment of 20-30 days abroad. It would mean putting my life and the lives of all of my family on hold. It would mean trusting foreign doctors and hospitals. And to expect positive results would be to expect a miracle. I am not sure that I have that kind of faith. I don't know if I could put the life of my child in someone else's hands; let him go.

During this Christmas season I have been focusing on Mary's role in the life of the Savior. I can imagine the confusion and amazement she felt when she realized that she was going to be the mother of God's son; that she was miraculously pregnant. I can only imagine the weight she carried as she contemplated the responsibility of raising such a child to adulthood. And then to hear godly people talk about His future in terms that included rejection and pain; how unbearable for a mother's heart!

But I do understand some of her situation. No, Aiden is not the Messiah!!! He is simply a little boy. I don't have the pressure of raising God's son. I have, however, been engaged to care for and love a little boy who is significantly different. I cannot see Aiden's future, not even a part of it. Fortunately I know who sees it all. Like Mary, I am not alone in caring for Aiden; the Lord God of Israel holds us in His hands.

I want to be like Mary and believe in the miraculous. However, in my heart I am struggling to believe that the Lord has miracles for us; that He wants to "provide a hope and a future" for us. (Actually, I am also a little afraid that His ideas for our future will not be what I want!!) (This is funny when you consider what the Lord has done!) So today as I sat down to have some quiet time with the Lord He gave me the low down on the whole "future" and "miracle" thing.

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him. I Corinthians 2:9

This Christmas season I want to believe in miracles. I want a sign, a sign of the season. I want to believe that Aiden will walk and talk, laugh and tell jokes, have friends and one day be in love. I want to know in my heart of hearts that all of God's plans are the best. I believe that today the Lord gave me that verse to remind me of His faithfulness to care for my son and my family.
Thank you Father.

Please continue to pray for our family as we seek to do the best for all of our children. Praise to the Lord as we enter this week before the celebration of Jesus' birth. Praise the Lord that we are almost finished with the therapy room. (As we head towards Christmas I am also thankful for another year personally--my b'day is 12/25). Continue to lift Shannon and her family. I pray that this would be a restful and healthy season for them.

Thank you all so much and blessings to all,
Christa

A trip to the mall

This time of the year a trip to the mall is a busy and sometimes overwhelming experience. People searching for the perfect gift; just the right things for friends and family. The mall decked out in lights and greenery. The sounds of familiar carols mixing with the ringing of the Salvation Army bell ringer outside. We did not head to the mall for any of these things. We headed there for space!

I am sure that I've mentioned that our home is rather "space challenged".
I am not exaggerating when I say that there is no need for Aiden to use his gait trainer in the house. Firstly, the space is so small that he can knee walk with less effort than it would take to stand up. Secondly, there is not enough room to maneuver the thing!! Therefore, we decided to go to the mall.

I am so fortunate that Aiden likes to walk. Tara and I barely got the gait trainer set up before he was ready to take off!! Aiden's loves to walk and be independent. It's good to be in a place where he is able to go and do. ( So often I feel like he is hindered by our lack of space.)

Aiden did really well. He spent 45 minutes walking the mall. We also spent some time on the little playground climbing up the stairs and sliding down the slide. Aiden maneuvered around tables and chairs in the food court and was able to steer the gait trainer with much less intervention than I've had to use in the past. ( Actually, I used to use a golf club to direct the trainer. It kept me from having to bend over so much. This time I didn't even take it.) Right before we left Aiden rode on a little carousel. He laughed and held on tight! I think that he enjoyed himself. I had a great time watching him, and trying to get some pictures of him on the ride. I knew that it was time to go home when Aiden started dragging his feet. After 45 minutes he was pretty tired so we headed home. It was a really good session. I was so proud of my little guy.

I have tried to be very transparent with all who read this blog. What you see is what you get with me. I really have no hidden agendas; I don't have time to play games with people. (That's not to say that I don't have fun!) As you know, one of my big projects has been to complete a room make over; changing a storage room to a therapy room. The pictures here are of some of the contents of the room and the room itself after Dave and I worked on it for six hours.

I wish that I could give great news.....The room is done! but I can't. As you can see, we have a significant amount of work to do. There are baby clothes to sort, golf clubs to pack up, educational supplies to go through, and tons of other things that need new homes. I am not opposed to throwing things out so that is not the issue. The issue it the sheer volume of stuff. Where did it
come from?? I blame the grandparents:)!No matter the source of the clutter, it all has to be dealt with in order to gain some kind of balance in my home.

For many of you this time of year is a struggle with balance; how to spend your time; where to spend the holidays; how to spend your money and on whom; how to keep the focus on the reason we celebrate as opposed to the busyness. I have struggled this year with the overwhelming feeling that we need nothing; that to give would be out of obligation, and to receive would be the same. My gifts to others would not be like those given by the Wise men. Those men brought gifts that were precious, timeless and useful.

That is the kind of gift that I would like to give all of my family this year. There is only one gift that truly meets all three of the criteria: Jesus. He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8); He never leaves us (Deuteronomy 31:6), and His gift, eternal life, is just that - eternal. I am blessed to be an adopted child of the heavenly Father (Galations 4:4-5). As you seek to celebrate this season, I pray that you do so as a child of the one born to save us all.

Blessings to all who are reading. I hope that you find some encouragement and I hope that you know what a blessing you are to me. Continue to pray for our progress. I am struggling with maintain a schedule with Aiden's PT. Also, our project-the room--seems to ebb and flow. I would like to have it done this week. Shannon let me know that Makayla had a good week. She seems to be recuperating well, and is sleeping better. Your prayers are certainly helpful.

Thank you all.
Christa

So, how many shoes does it take to fit one pair of orthotics???

This may seem like a strange question to many of you, but for us it's like the old "How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop" question. Finding shoes that will fit over Aiden's orthotics is really not that difficult until you consider that he wears a size 5 1/2 shoe and his orthotics require about a size 7. They aren't actually that much bigger than his feet. It just requires that much extra space to maneuver the orthotics into the foot opening.

So I embarked on "The Great Shoe Search". Because kids out grow shoes so quickly, and because the likelihood that I will have to cut them is great, I started at Wal-Mart. No luck there. Apparently, Wal-mart has decided that there isn't enough money in children's' shoes so they are only carrying a small selection. Next, I headed to Target. Addison and I looked at shoes for 35
minutes trying to find the right style and size. We came up empty handed. It was pretty discouraging.

It's not like Aiden is running around barefooted. We do have shoes to fit Aiden and his orthotics. The only problem is that they are sandals!! If we lived in a warmer climate I wouldn't worry, but we live in the mountains. There might actually be snow at some point. Therefore, the search had to be continued.

In a last ditch effort to find shoes for my sweet little guy, Dave and I headed out to the Target in Richmond. I was not very optimistic about finding anything, but I went hoping that maybe we'd get lucky. Surprise, surprise! We came home with 9 pairs of shoes.

Not all of them fit; actually only one pair could be effectively disassembled to accommodate his orthotics. But one pair is better than nothing. They are similar in style to the shoes we used with the therasuit; wide heal, wide toe, fabric. I was concerned that the only way that we could get them on would be to "hinge" the backs again. Instead, my mom noticed that the tongue of the shoe could be loosened to allow for easier entry.

Finally armed with a new pair of shoes, we headed to our orthotist today. Marvin trimmed and sanded the orthotics a little and that made getting Aiden's shoes on even easier. YEAH!!!!!

I am convinced that much of my life is like our shoe search. I have to try on a lot of shoes before I find a good fit. Translation: I have to try alot of ways to do things; organizing my house, motivating my kids, scheduling our therapy, etc. , before I finally find what is best for us as family. For much of my life I have felt that I had to do things well all of the time; had to be the best that I could be, and live up to all of the expectations that people had of me. (What a very constraining life to live.) I now know that there is only one person who's expectations I have to fill; the Lord.

God accepts me as I am; a woman who loves her family, does her best as a wife and mother (most of the time), tries to be a good friend, and falls short of the standard of perfection all of the time. I am ok with not reaching the standard. Trying to be "perfect" all of the time was tiring and demoralizing. I could never quite measure up and felt bad about it all of the time. The life that I have as a forgiven child of God provides me with freedom from a standard that I can never achieve.

The birth of Jesus freed us all from having to live up to perfection; He gave us the option to have "the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding"...guarding "our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:7
As we head into the Christmas season I hope that you will learn to live in the place of peace that the Lord can provide.

Thank you all so much for you prayers. Aiden was exposed to RSV over the Thanksgiving holiday and Addison required a quick trip home from Richmond on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving because of an ear infection. Once we got home both Dave and I developed some nasty respiratory virus that has us blowing noses, drying eyes and coughing to beat the band. (At one point over the last week we ran out of paper towels, napkins, tissues and we were down to one partial roll of toilet paper all because there was so much nose blowing going on!!) Thankfully, Aiden has shown no signs of RSV and the rest of us are rapidly on the mend.

Continue to pray for Shannon and her family. I believe that Makayla is continuing to improve. Shannon is concerned about the rest of this winter season. I would ask that you pray for good health for them along with peace for Shannon's "mother's heart". It is sometimes hard to find rest in the Lord when your kids are involved. (I am sure that there are moms who know what I'm talking about:) )

Blessings to you all. I won't let so much time pass next time.
Christa